The UK has just experienced the hottest July day on record. Back in my flat all the windows and doors are open, there is little breeze, I'm sweltering and baffled. Not just baffled but puzzled, confused, perplexed and trying to digest events that to most seem beyond belief.
My slightly cryptic notes on here about a plan all came to nought today with a simple e mail. It was a plan involving a job and Cambridge. A job that could have been made for me. Who with my experience and knowledge of Cambridge would possibly want a job of that nature? Well I suppose there must be someone out there as I didn't even get an interview.
In what I laughingly call my career I have faced setback, confusion, rejection, stigma and all manner of failure. What then is another setback? Well to me it feels that if I can't even get an interview for that job what else will ever happen.
This may all sound self indulgent were it not for the fact everyone else who is familiar with my work and my life in Cambridge are stunned by it. So I'm not alone but that doesn't help. Will another opportunity come my way? Maybe.
Given what has happened in my life I suppose I have done well. Few people ever get out of the benefits trap. Few unqualified people have got into such an influential position as a mental health practitioner. Yet I'm still where I was yesterday. Just now wondering once again what next?
I Heard a Voice.
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