Looking out the window on an incredibly wet summer day my mind is taken back to that summer of 2007. It was the summer I uprooted my life and moved to Hertfordshire. That summer it poured down for months as I was wracked with anxiety about the future. In the end I got the flat on the Thursday, moved on the Sunday and started the job on the Monday.
All these years later I see those who surrounded me then all moved on into retirement or up the greasy pole. And me? I'm still treating water. I have moved nowhere and am beginning to wonder if anything ever will change. There was promise of help to make my life more manageable yet I learned this week other expectation will in all likelihood make it more complicated. Why am I taking on yet another role? In truth as my great friend Kym once said "you have all the responsibility but none of the power". And it would seem that is the way it would stay.
So as I enter another weekend I am flat and uninterested. Yes next week I will go to Kent for Laura's wedding. Yes I will go to see dad. But when I come back it will all still be there. I fear already for the beginning of term madness.
I Heard a Voice.
No comments:
Post a Comment