Absent With Leave.

For all the plans that have gone into action in the past two weeks, it was clear from the start that not all would go smoothly. Progress in happening exactly two weeks after the bombshell of the move. Much of my life is packed up. Much is thrown away. And much recycled. The kindness of my friends continues to amaze me.

Jo was going to come and help today but cannot now come as she has to look after her parents. She will instead come tomorrow so the plan is just a little delayed. I was all set to make us lunch when we took a break but it wasn't to be. So I have been plodding on alone. Washing, cleaning and wrapping. Not all my most skilled talents but I'm doing the best I can. I have nightmares that something will happen in Jess's life on Thursday when she is due to come down but we will keep our fingers crossed.

I rang the agent today and they confirmed that barring signing the contract and picking up the keys on Saturday the flat is mine. I think I have six people coming to help Saturday lunchtime. I hope we can make short work of things but it will take some time to unpack.

Hard to judge where I am mentally today. Whilst my dinner out with friends last night was excellent I cannot overall say yesterday was good; my fear remained high all day. The lingering low mood rumbles on and occasionally work comes into that equation and muddies my troubled mind. In a sense it is on the back burner for the time being but must be addressed at some point. In my anguish late last night that feared mental cutting almost came into play with thoughts of looking at work e mails. I didn't do that though.

I'm not sure what to tackle next after the washing is done. There's not a lot of room to move or store things now. I fear some will have to be completed on the day. But at least I've done something on this wet dull afternoon.

Must ring my dad later. Take care on this first day of the working week. I will persevere and in the end we will conclude a most unexpected, unwelcome and unhappy interlude in my life.

I Heard a Voice.