Someone asked me a couple of years ago "who are your allies"? In the context of that day I had to dodge the question; I had no allies in that room. In fact I have plenty. Many rate me far more highly than I deserve. But there are a lot who would want me by there side when the shit is flying. Sadly none of my allies have any power to help me.
On another day of relentless rain I am reflecting on an interesting couple of days. I'm irritated and struggling to switch my mind off. Cooking home made shepherd's pie did not help even though it was good. Beer is having no effect. I'm restless. Yet there is a glimmer. For what has been clear over those days is that the sands of power are shifting. None will come to me, I'm not important enough. But change might brings allies who do choose to help me.
I'm aware this is just the start. Where I am in a year is anyone's guess. The big question is how long am I prepared to wait for something that may not happen? In truth if I see an opportunity I will check it out, size it up then maybe try to change my life.
For now the mayhem of term is well and truly under way-I have 6 students to see tomorrow. Nothing dramatic has happened so once again I reflect on a another week with just 2 days to its end. I'm getting older but I'm not burning out, chronically depressed, searingly angry or in my mini mania. Just a bit irritated and restless. Time for some American football I think-I know the Rams lost this week but I'm slightly heartened that they were more competitive than the score suggested.
I Heard a Voice.
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