Moving on From Catastrophe.

It was two years ago today that I stepped out from this very flat into the winter cold to do a little shopping, drop round to dad's surgery and to meet Beth and her then new boyfriend. Little did I know that a few hours later catastrophe would strike and our lives could have been diminished forever.

Dad had been ill all over the holiday. Who would think that the common cold could kill an almost healthy old man? After asking for a home visit from the GP, doing the shopping and meeting Beth I returned to the flat to find dad had fallen. I waited for an ambulance for two hours. It was the longest two hours of my life. Driving to the hospital an hour later I saw dad in bed hooked up to a drip and fighting for his life. After they decided he was well enough to go home I pleaded with them to keep him in. He couldn't stand up or dress himself. He was incoherent and looking terrible. Eventually they agreed to let him stay in.

Having driven 60 miles to and from the hospital in freezing conditions I eventually made it to bed gone 4 am. I slept little. The next day I collected him and stayed on to look after him. Terror was my only emotion. Sprinkle in a mountain of anxiety and you get the picture.

When I finally got home I thought we could just bide our time, take it a day at a time and he would get better. Little did I know my useless landlord who had scammed me for nine years was about to turf me out of my flat. That is what happened.

My relapse of 2018 was worse than I could have ever imagined. I was off work for nearly 6 months, I lost all my confidence and the belief that I had beaten mental illness was shattered.

Reflecting two years on, dad is well, I'm well, I live in a much nicer flat, the agents look after me, I'm back at work and I've hit 50. How does one avoid catastrophe in that way? Dad would say God. I do not know.

But I do know that we survived. And we thrived. It is my last day in Kent. Tomorrow I return home. I'm relieved I have no work until the 6th. When I get home I will live, thrive and relish both. We survived. Now I will leave you with the note that we can celebrate out of catastrophe, thrive on adversity and know that the apocalypse can be averted.

Take care.

I Heard a Voice.