When I was singing I quite liked the Good Friday service. For those not in the know Good Friday marks the day of Christ's crucifixion. It is a very Holy day for Christians in what is known as Holy Week. On Sunday the resurrection is marked by a cascade of upbeat celebratory music. Music still plays a huge part in my life ever if I don't sing or play anymore.
A couple of years ago on this day I rose early and caught the train to Cambridge to go to King's. I specifically wanted to hear Allegri's Miserere and Lotti's Crucifixus. I was sadly disappointed that they only sang an abridged version of the Allegri and it was not very good and they didn't do the Lotti at all. Searching on YouTube yesterday for a suitable recording to listen today I discovered that King's shortening the piece was not a one off but their normal effort now. Not really what I would expect of arguably the greatest choir of its type in the world. What is the musical world coming to?
I did listen to both pieces as is my wont. Now I have no idea what to do with my day. In truth I'm not feeling great. Having had a better few days the low mood, tiredness and lack of motivation have come back. It was a struggle to eat anything at lunch time. That sense of nausea that sometimes comes with fear and suppressed appetite has been noticeable today.
The thought of shutting out the world is enticing today. But I don't think that is a good idea. What to do though? Empty days are never much fun. A sense of nothing is unnerving but hardly a new experience for me. All the signs were pointing to getting better so a bad day now upsets the rhythm that I had hoped I was building up. Let us hope it is just an abberration. Tomorrow is another day so I fight through today and accept that it is going to happen. Brighter days will come, I just need to be patient.
I Heard a Voice.
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