Dull Pain, Dull Day but Glittering Music.

I was in two minds whether to post today or not. For a while I thought I had nothing to say. The outlook is not great, I'm still in the dull pain of a damaged shoulder. It is a dull day and I feel quite cold. But I cannot waste a precious Sunday.

In a move away from opera I have returned to the glorious Messiah. That masterpiece has been a constant in my life since I sang it in my first Founder's Day concert at King's in December 1978. That was the month the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan. I was a sometimes quiet and sometimes overwrought 9 year old. Yes I went away a week after my 9th birthday. Sometimes people erroneously choose to call it being sent away. I actually quite enjoyed boarding and chose to do it. That I paid a price is evident years later but I do not regret it.

Almost 40 years ago. That makes me feel old. Well older than the middle age I actually am. Does time speed up when we get older? I have certainly hurtled at alarming speed from 40 to nearly 48. I always remember my 40th as it was the day Jayne came back into my life. That the hiatus in our friendship was at least partially explained later was down to my mania that is unrecognised by the shrinks. I call them my buzzy times. Not full blown mania as I have seen so often in others but a more down to earth but arrogant elevation of my sense of self.

I still wish those days would come back but they have been markedly absent in recent years. What I learned from that unfortunate and painful break is that I must lower mood and well as raise mood when the time comes. Too many extremes are not good for me. Since then I have kept my mood diary.

On this dull day my mood is a little dull and flat. But then I would hardly be ecstatic with this unexplained shoulder pain. I'm hoping Alyssa is able to help when she comes over later. I will be treating my friends to roast pork. Bit low on apple sauce as I forgot to buy another jar. But having disliked it for so many years, fruit and meat was never my thing, I'm sure I can do without it just today.

Tomorrow another working week dawns. Will I feel better? I do hope so. Enjoy the rest of Sunday and see you next time.

I Heard a Voice.